Thoughts While Running #025
why wylder?
The store opens in just a few days and it’s been a journey. I’ve screamed into a pillow 3 times in the past 48 hours and probably would have cried had I not become so adept at disconnecting from my emotions. Something I tried to do in all my years working as a creative in a corporate environment but did not master until recently. Perhaps it’s just the utter exhaustion of it all that makes it easier *not* to cry, if the dam breaks it takes too much effort to repair.
I haven’t done a lot to promote Running Wylder - the store or the substack. I didn’t start either to hustle harder. Both were created as an expression of who I am; a reflection of my life, my interests, my love of running, family and community. Everything I’ve done with both has been reflective of who I am as a person. The newsletter born out of a way to provide structure in my suddenly structureless day, a tether to my end goal and an outlet for my thoughts. The store a way to connect with community, hold space for one of my passions, and (if I’m being honest) sell cool shit.
Starting a newsletter seems to be very on trend these days. Had I chosen to create a substack that catered to my 20 years of concept + trend expertise I might have hundreds or even thousands of subscribers because thanks to this platform, anyone with a computer can be a fashion editor. But i did not; I chose a very specific and niche combination of motherhood, fashion and running because that is who I am. To do one without the other would be inauthentic.
Starting a physical retail store in a post-pandemic Amazon/Shein/Temu ‘look at my haul of 25 dresses for $30’ culture might be less on trend, especially in a city where patagonia vests and Allbirds seem to be the universal uniform. I’m also not following any precharter paths. I’m not opening a ‘traditional ‘specialty run store, the small business version of REI and I’m not opening a supercool streetwear inspired run store. I’m opening a running lifestyle store that focuses on running, fashion and community because that is who I am. While I might have fantasized about it when I was 16 when I watched the Real World Seattle, I’ve never shopped at REI nor do I consider myself a ‘cool’ person. I am a mom, a runner, and I like nice things.
From the outside looking in, I am Living the Dream. Or rather, living out my dream, which is exciting and when I step back and remove myself from the situation, inspiring. How many of us have had dreams we created off the side of our desk and how many of us have had the privilege to actually actualize our escapist fantasies? I’ve watched friends launch their own businesses, cheerleading from the sidelines with a mix of excitement, awe and jealousy. Five years ago my therapist asked me who my dream company would be to work for and the answer I was too scared to acknowledge was ‘myself’. She then sent me a ‘create your own job’ listing from Everlane which I read through such a cynical lens, I knew my time in the corporate design world was coming to an end.
So why ‘running wylder?’
I’ve been a runner all my life. I haven’t always loved it, but it’s been a constant thread throughout. I used to begrudgingly walk/run races as a tween with my parents before eventually joining the cross country team in high school. I ran a marathon as a PE credit in college because a friend convinced me to sign up for the class with her (god bless public universities). I ran off and on throughout my 20s and eventually got back into it more seriously while living in Vancouver. Simply because I liked being active and was surrounded by some of the best and raddest runners I have ever met.
I eventually grew to love running : the physicality of it, pushing my body (and my mind) to its limits. I ran races friends and my brother convinced me to sign up for, until eventually I realized racing wasn’t what fuels me but rather it’s simply the act of being outside, feet hitting the pavement, that keeps me mentally (+ physically) healthy. These days my life thrives on flexibility and since it isn’t popular to run at noon on a Saturday, I unfortunately don’t run with a crew anymore, but it was my love of community that had drawn me back to to the sport. I love that I am part of a collective hole, even if/while it’s an activity I do in solitude.
Wylder is my son’s middle name. I didn’t name him knowing I would one day repurpose it for my own gain, I had just hoped ‘Wylder’ might be indicative of his spirit, one that is untethered and unafraid, one that is excited to carve his own path out in the world. He gets his first name from me (Douglas) and his last name from his dad. Unfortunately he also gets his slightly apprehensive + risk averse approach to life from me as well, but as he runs around ‘nakey’ I can attest he is as uninhibited as possible in the way only toddlers with no external influence from their peers can be, and I hope to encourage him to live this way for as long as possible.
I always knew I wanted to leave my corporate job eventually. My personality isn’t well suited for the layers of approval and feedback that comes with the corporate life and I was miserable more than I wasn’t. When I got pregnant I started thinking a lot about my legacy, and the example I wanted to live for my son to one day witness. Would I want him working a job he didn’t like simply because it was a paycheck? Ideally not but I also realize that there is a level of privilege I have that has afforded me this perspective. I hope that someday he has the courage (and the financial means) to choose a profession that inspires him. In looking back on my own career, I’ve worked for some amazing brands at the height of their popularity; a wild ride that has come to an end. I’d exhausted opportunities for promotion, for growth and it was time I figured out what legacy I wanted to live into for this next chapter of my life.
So while right now it’s screaming into a pillow and cueing up angry emails to send at 6am (true story), I know this is short lived. The last 10k is always the most painful, but how sweet is that banana once you cross the finish line?
*k
Almost there! Love you.
Proud of you Katie girl! And so excited to shop! Congrats to an epic milestone! Love!